about us

Ryan

Ryan “Rdot” Spillers was born into this world on June 6th, 1985 by Andrea Lisa Schor and August Edward Spillers. At the time of birth, Rdot’s destiny was unclear. As he grew older and wider, he began to understand the importance of staying nourished and hydrated while not ingesting carbohydrates past five o’clock on weekday evenings. Growing up in the mean streets of a miscellaneous mid-western city with a population no more than 250,000, he realized that there was two very important things in life that he must accomplish before he was grabbing a nurse’s jacket screaming for his pain pills— to become the first U.S. President to be elected with the campaign slogan “Holla at’cha boy!”, and the second was to have 14.5 children, all with the name “Laser Mercedes Woo-Brown Spillers Esquire III”. Although it is uncertain what the future holds for Mr. Spillers, one thing is known: He must use his woo-powers for good, and not evil… unless it’s considered evil to persuade a girl to buy him a box of chicken from KFC.

John

One year removed from priviate institutionalized higher education, John “TheOysta” spends his free time jumping off 2 story houses into backyard pools. His mission is to create something out of nothing, turning a boring day into a hysterical adventure. He grew up playing baseball for the California Angels at the tender age of 6 and was touted by the Garden Grove Journal as the real life Henry Rowengartner at the ripe age of 8. However, while doing one handed pull ups later that year, he tore the Supraspinatus in his right shoulder, ending his hopes of breaking Nolan Ryan’s strikeout record. He is currently in talks with college and high school coaches in hopes of continuing his sports career in the online business world.